clock Released On 05 October 2015

Helen's blog: Getting back on your bike

On holiday in Cornwall earlier this year, my husband and I decided to cycle the Camel trail, a tranquil, green route. Our 3 year old daughter rode behind my husband on a child’s tandem bike. A wheel either side for extra stability made this wider than normal. I’m a worrier so we insisted on full safety gear: helmet, padded back and side supports with a chest harness. We had a blissful hour's ride before disaster struck.  When the trail unexpectedly joined a busy road, my husband turned off left, forgetting the tandem’s extra width. It mounted the kerb, cornered on one wheel then crashed into the road with our daughter underneath. I screamed and ran to extricate her.  She was howling with the shock but thanks to all the safety equipment, she escaped without a scratch. A medicinal ice-cream worked wonders, whilst my husband and I agonised over the incident for days after.

But our daughter’s confidence was knocked. Trying to encourage her, I recognised some parallels with my own situation.  After 3 years as a full-time parent, I recently returned to work.  This isn’t always easy: a  report from the European Commission (EC report) reveals that twice as many mothers in Britain fail to return to full-time work after maternity leave compared to EU counterparts.  Even after securing your dream new job, it isn’t always as simple as just 'hopping back on', as I discovered.

First, there's the obvious issue of feeling rusty. I'd switched off completely from professional matters, plus we live in rural semi-isolation, a world away from the cut and thrust of my former City life.

Secondly, working part-time and from home - two aspects of my new job which I value highly - can make for a slower transition than being full-time in an office.  Just as I'm in full flow, it's time to switch back into parenting mode.  And there's little to symbolise heading into work beyond shutting the door on the toys strewn over the sitting room floor.

Finally, my confidence in my professional expertise had seeped away like a leaky nappy. Initially, I found it hard to shake off the feeling that it was a different 'me' who had achieved my pre-parenthood career highs.

So what has helped?

1.  Re-reading appreciative feedback from past colleagues and clients. Likewise, at a recent Citymothers seminar, Women Returners recommended listing past achievements rather than perceived strengths. It's harder to argue with yourself about the former.

2.  Creating a proper (albeit tiny) home office. Obvious maybe, but surprisingly effective.

3. Networking. Through WorkLife Central’ and other events, I've reconnected with City life and other working parents with similar experiences.

4. Trying new things. Returning to work after a career break is a fantastic opportunity to set new goals and surprise yourself.

And our daughter?

Inviting a friend to cycle with her and setting small goals with rewards (like bike streamers) worked a treat.  And she never complains about wearing her helmet….

Helen Beedham is Head of Corporate Affairs at WorkLife Central and a member of the Citymothers and Cityfathers Network Committee. She previously worked in management consulting in London for 15 years.  She is married with two step-children aged 19 and 21 and a daughter aged 4 and lives in rural Kent. 

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