clock Released On 18 April 2018

Rosie's blog: Unexpected Easter

In common with most parents, the Easter holidays was being looked forward to with huge anticipation this year. Easter as the time of new beginnings is always one of our favourite times of year. We had booked a ski trip for the second week of the holidays and were going with friends; something we all would enjoy. We would also be away for my eldest son’s 13th birthday, another milestone, to celebrate with friends in the snow was all a boy could ask for . . .

 

So, we rewind back to the week before Easter and my younger son (11) came in from playing in the garden on Tuesday evening with what looked like a nettle rash.  On Wednesday he went to school and felt quite well, but was almost immediately sent home as he’d been sick and had a very high temperature. The rash spread and was combined with some other symptoms. A couple of GP consultations followed over that day and the next and on Friday he seemed ok. But on Saturday in the early hours, he had breathing difficulties. The live wire of the family, the youngest has never been sickly or wallowed in illness, so we knew this was serious. By that Saturday, he had been admitted to the local paediatric A&E and was deteriorating rapidly. There was no diagnosis and he was just getting worse. His results and condition were being monitored by the London hospitals and by Easter Monday we were in an ambulance in what might have been the quickest trip to London I had known. He had quickly developed pneumonia as fluid gathered in his lungs and around his heart and could not take in drink or food.

 

As all semblance of normality ebbed away: the planned Easter festivities, the family get-togethers and the enjoyment of time away from work on the forthcoming holiday, I began to really consider how serious this could be. The potential of life changing outcomes was being discussed, which was hard to take in. I remember thinking after my marriage broke down that I was no longer afraid of anything. The times in the hospital this last week helping my boy to walk and holding him as he fought for breath and struggled to retain consciousness were some of the most frightening moments I have known.

 

The attitude of work has been brilliant. As one day has slipped into the next, with different ideas of what might have made him unwell in the first place, then more ideas, tests, waiting, talking to many hugely experienced doctors and nurses, all the while praying for signs of recovery, I have realised that I am not alone. So many parents go through similar, distressing traumas with their own children; their solidarity and ability to read through and pick up during the gaps this situation has imposed on me has been incredible. Support comes from the most unlikely corners.

 

Special people come to the fore, both on the home and work fronts. A friendly cabbie took me to the hospital free of charge the other day as my ex and I swapped our shifts at our son’s bedside. Buoyed up by the goodwill of family, friends, colleagues and even strangers, this experience (whilst not over) has also made me see many positives, even in adversity. The shared experiences I have witnessed and heard since this started encourages me that one is never really alone, however dire the situation. I wait and hope for my son’s recovery and enjoy hearing him laugh and plan his escape from hospital. These moments are coming more frequently and so hopefully the outcomes will be good. It is a new beginning of sorts, but not quite as I thought.

 

Rosie is a partner in a City law firm with two sons aged 13 and 11. She is a single parent and works at her office in the City and at home.

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